The Wisdom of Obscurity

One of the things that I never could have known when I was younger, is the potential danger in showing your true strength. If you appear powerful, you can be perceived as a threat. If you are powerful, then assuming a guise of weakness is a protection. In the same way that flaunting your wealth can make you a target.

This is the Wisdom of Obscurity.

When I was younger, I never truly understood how dangerous people can be — and not in the way that I thought. I never had real fear of people physically, because while there is fear in any potential altercation, there are few who could present real danger to me. I learned the hard way that the real danger of people is in social engineering, and in the narratives that people can create.

If you draw too much attention to yourself, if you appear too strong, happy, wealthy, successful, driven, you can gain the attention of dangerous people who will seek to take that away from you. In ways far more devious, manipulative, and Machiavellian than I ever realized were possible before.

Keep Yourself Hidden

You do not have to live in fear, in obscurity. However, it is wise to learn how to be obscure, and even more so to learn how not to need the adoration, idolization, respect, and support of others.

If you tell others of what you have, some might try to take it from you. If you appear like you are about to achieve success, there are people who will attempt to derail it out of pure malice.

There are people like that. I have met them. I have dealt with people who attempt to fabricate narratives with the intent of legal action. Attempting to instigate a conflict, to claim assault, and put you in jail. There are people in my own family like that. I have learned to be careful — and far more self-controlled even than I was before.

The lesson here is called
“The wisdom of obscurity.
The gentle outlast the strong
The obscure outlast the obvious
Hence, a fish that ventures from deep water
is soon snagged by a net
A country that reveals its strength
is soon conquered by an enemy.
— Verse 36, Tao Te Ching, Lao Tzu (Jonathan Star translation)

Hide Your Strength, Pretend To Be Weak

Sometimes it is better to hide your strength, and pretend to be weak, pretend to have been defeated, so your opponent thinks that they have won. There are occasions when this is the best move, because you need time to make the moves to get out from the situation.

I can imagine that there are many people who were born into street life, who need only to survive until they are an adult to escape as unscathed as possible. Don’t appear too strong, because you could earn the attention of the wrong people.

It is not about being afraid to fight. That you can’t, that you aren’t able, or that you don’t want to — I can, am able, and I want to. Yet I had to learn the hard way that you have to pick your battles. You cannot stand up to every single bully, and balk at every offence. Sometimes you have to take it, because what you have in motion is far more important than winning a small battle.

Sometimes you have to sacrifice small battles, in order to win the war.

This is how life works. You have to learn to take the abuse, take the pain, and endure. Keep going, regardless of what anyone else says. And most of the time, you might find that you have to do your work in secret.

Hide your strength, appear weak, and keep yourself a secret — until you are ready. Until you are ready for battle. Until you are ready for war. Until your plans are in motion, that their momentum cannot be stopped.

People let their egos win too often. They are desperate to appear strong, so they make mistakes, and often pay for those mistakes. Sometimes with their lives. Don’t waste your life of small battles. This is the wisdom of obscurity.